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Immortal Beloved
by Hannurdock

Fandom: Vampire Chronicles
Pairing: Original Characters
Disclaimers: The characters from the Chronicles belong to Anne Rice.

These stories are purely for pleasure and 'What if's'. 

Nothing is meant to infringe upon the author's rights.

I am doing this for fun and I love sharing my stories with others.
Notes: Fem-SLASH, Violent
Summary: During 'The Tale of the Body Thief'. James does some horrific things whilst in Lestat's body
Warnings: F/F Slash .... Violence

Chapter One

It all began one evening as I was curled up in my bed, reading The Vampire Lestat with wide eyes. It was raining outside, the night was thunderous and dangerous. I was safe. Curled up in my nice warm bed.

I have medium length blonde hair, which became lighter during the summer months. I have greyish eyes, and petite frame. I have a distinct personality, quite loud and I can be annoying at times when I feel like it.

But I digress. Back to the story at hand. It was on the dark and stormy night that the unthinkable occurred. Indeed, I was happily reading my book, relaxing before work the next day when the window smashed and a blonde haired man stood before shattered glass.

I knew his face of course. It was plastered on the front of the dustcover of my copy of The Vampire Lestat.

"Lestat .....?" I cried, dropping the book and looking at him curiously.

Something was wrong.

There was a manic gleam in his eye, a startling ferocious and predatory look.

"No, not Lestat. My name is James Raglan" James replied, the blonde hair falling around his shoulders in carefree waves.

"Raglan James?" I was terrified. He looked exactly like Lestat de Lioncourt, the hero of the second novel of the Vampire Chronicles.

"Yes my dear. Lestat and I have .... changed places for a short while. I am experiencing some of the most fantastic thefts in my career. All but one, and I am here to experience it firsthand". James took a step closer.

I backed away. "What do you mean? I don't understand ..."

"The making of a fledgling, my fledgling. I steal your life and make you have this existence. The perfect crime" James reached me and stroked my cheek with the back of his hand. A second later he backhanded me viciously, and sent me spinning into the wall. Stunned, I glanced at him with tearful eyes as he advanced upon me like a bird of prey.

"Please ...." I gasped.

"What? You will have nothing from me. No instruction of how to survive, no indication of your power. I will give you nothing, except a minimal amount of Lestat's strong blood. We'll see how strong a fledgling born of nothing can be". James kicked me viciously in the stomach. I gasped and doubled over in pain. He clutched my blonde hair carelessly in his left hand and tugged me along the floor to the bed.

I screamed in agony, feeling the burning pain in my head explode as he pulled me along by my hair. He lifted me roughly and shoved me onto the bed, and I fought him as best as I could. But it was like fighting a rock. He was immovable. He punched me in the face, and I felt my right eye swell as bruising discoloured my skin. I moaned in pain, as he viciously turned my head to the left and sank his vampire fangs roughly into my neck.

I didn't experience the swoon because he pulled back seconds later and tore his own wrist. He forced the bleeding wound to my mouth and I vomited in disgust. Forcing the wrist against my mouth he forced me to swallow, a mixture of blood and vomit, as he felt my breasts. I coughed as the wrist was removed from my mouth and again he backhanded me roughly. I was sent spinning across the room and crashed into a long, oval mirror.

Groaning, my head spinning, I rose shakily to my knees. The whole world was rotating around me and I vomited again. James clutched me by the hair again, and I screamed in agony as he dragged me back over to the bed and sunk his teeth once again.

Crying and moaning I fought him as much as I could, but all in vain. He was sucking my entire life from me, thieving my spirit and turning me into a vampires rape victim. My eyes were blurred from the tears I was shedding helplessly.

He forced his wrist to my mouth once again, and roughly scraped his flesh against my teeth. I choked as both flesh and blood rushed into my mouth and I swallowed again, gulping down the liquid.  

He slapped me across the face and I fell to the floor once again, glass shards piercing my skin. I cried in pain, and looked up to find my merciless tormentor gone.

Vanished. As if he had never been there.

However, I was bruised and injured and I curled up onto the floor, breathing in heavy gasps as I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. My heart felt like it was going to explode. I fought to breathe with laboured effort, and I could feel everything inside me being forced out. I was vomiting and shitting, and my body was a sweaty and shaking mess. I crawled to the bed and put the covers up over my head and I cried and cried and cried.

Nothing worse in this world than rape. And a vampire rape magnifies the horror of the event. I was alone, and the death cramps violently seized me. Unsure of what I should do, I curled up and sobbed.  The pain was nothing compared to what James had done to me.

Suddenly my limbs began to feel heavy. My eyes were closing and I was powerless to fight this sudden numbing sensation. I stopped crying and small whimpers escaped my body.

That was the last conscious thought before the first rays of sunlight penetrated the room. Luckily, I was safe and sound beneath the covers in the dark. I had been horribly attacked and I felt so vulnerable and alone.

Then everything went pitch black.

Chapter Two

The next evening I awoke in agony. My immortal body had rid itself of the typical waste, such as food and I was hungry as hell. I really thought I would pass out from hunger, the feeling was so severe.

I peeked out over the bed covers and saw the curtain flapping in the breeze by the broken window. I sighed and stood up a little shakily, and walked over to the bathroom. The mirror in the little room reflected something which looked like me, but seemed monstrous with the reflective and luminous greyish eyes, and two front teeth were sharp and extended. My fingernails were glassy, I could see small red veins beneath the surface. My hair had filled out a little, gained a lustre I could not even begin to describe.

I examined my new teeth in the little bathroom mirror. Small and sharp. Disgusting things really. How on earth would I survive without biting my own tongue every three seconds? Not only that, but the hunger was intensifying with every passing second. I looked at myself in the mirror. What a sorry sight. I needed a bath. I needed to cut my hair a little and clean myself up generally.

My thoughts wandered to the events of the previous evening and I shuddered a little at the thought of that vampire touching me with his icy hands. I had no idea really who this animal was, and why he had attacked me so roughly. What had I done to deserve his wrath. He was not the gentle and kind Lestat I had read about in the novel. He was a bully and abusive. I hated him, and I hoped the sun had caught him before he reached a safe sanctuary.

That was a good point. I'd have to watch out for the sun rising. Last night had been a disaster, but instinctively my body had shielded itself from sunlight. Now I had to sit down, and stop admiring myself in the mirror. I had to think about what I was, read Lestat's book again and try and decide on a course of action.

Running through my head were thoughts of suicide. I still could not believe that I was a vampire. A creature of the undead. A night walker. I would never see the sunlight again. I would have to kill human beings to live. What a disaster.  I hated myself, hated the fact I was born a monster and had no say. Hated my own weakness and hunger that was driving at my soul.

The clock struck midnight and I started. Four hours had passed so very quickly. Did time always fly by this quickly when you have forever? Eternity seemed like a passing collection of shadows to me, something I had not wanted nor needed. My own existence was a sham, and I knew with guilt that I should have died yesterday. I should have been killed and my soul should have been freed of the mortal body which I was now forever trapped in.

Tragedy. I glanced at the clock and moaned when I saw half an hour had passed like the blink of an eye. I trudged wearily to the broken window and looked out at the sleeping world.

Time to feed or time to die. Which one? Should I kill a mortal simply because I want to live another night? Should I take a life to satisfy a hunger that would never be completely fulfilled? Tears were forming, and I was powerless to stop them from surging down my face like a river. I was so very lost. So very alone.

Time to feed or time to die.

I had to make up my mind immediately either way.

Chapter Three

I wandered the streets, marvelling at how light I felt and how fast I could walk. Indeed, the thirst seemed to intensify my every movement. I watched mortals passing to the left and right of me, and the hunger flipped my stomach at the mere sight of them.I needed food. I needed it now.

At last, I saw my saviour. A little old lady, stuck in the 1950's mumbling calming and soothing words only she understood walked the dirty sidewalk. She stopped when she saw me, a white and glistening person ahead of her and she said a word in French that I understood to be Angel. She walked towards me, wrapping her hands and arms around me and looked into my eyes expectantly.

I brushed her dirty hair out of her face and smiled gently at her. She smiled back, her eyes full of tears that ran down her face and pooled at the top of her upper lip. She gazed at me with a glazed expression, her old hands tracing my facial features.

I felt so tender to the fragile creature. My lips travelled down her neck until I felt the vein pumping against my skin, demanding to be ruptured. Her passion intensified with this movement, she was begging me to continue. Lost to lust and the ravages of time.

I kissed the pounding flesh, feeling the heavens open to me as I drove my fang teeth into the aged flesh and felt the hard jet of her blood hit the back of my throat. Like gold and jewels and light. Her dirty body was warm and rich and full of emotion as her former days flashed before me like lightening.

She had been born in 1924, had grown up in a small village with her mother and two brothers. Her father had ran away when she was six years old, and she had never truly recovered from his loss. She had been beautiful in her prime, a blonde haired beauty who teased the village boys with her lustrous body and graceful manner. She had lived a charmed life until she was fifty. She had a successful marriage and two children of her own. However, when her husband ran away mirroring her father's actions her life took a dramatic turn for the worse. She became an alcoholic, and a drug addict. She lost her home to debt and her children turned their backs on her believing she was mad. She had been walking the streets for almost ten years, alone, afraid and miserable.

Until this night.

As I drank, I felt her forgiveness and gratitude flood me. She knew what I was and she welcomed death. I filled her with visions of how she had once been, beautiful and passionate and full of life. As her eyes dulled, I became conscious of the beat of her heart. It was failing, becoming slower as she drifted toward death with a happy heart and a clean conscience. She was being loved. The cost of her life meant nothing to her.

Then the beating ceased.

I let her go. I steadied myself against a railing nearby and watched the body in amazement, watching the peaceful expression on her face.

Kneeling beside her, I slashed my nail against my thumb and let the blood heal the wounds on her pale and aged throat. I carried her body carefully to a small dumpster, and lowered her into the rubbish. Carefully, I placed a few plastic bags full of rubbish over her body and then walked away.

The blood was rushing into every pore of my skin, every fibre of my body. I was surrounded by her living heat, pulsating into every vein. I felt my face and looked at my hands. I looked alive and healthy. I felt full and happy.

I decided not to go home that night. Instead, I sought the nearest graveyard.  I opened a hefty tomb and walked down a winding staircase into the very heart of the dead. I lay behind a dusty coffin and felt my eyes closing as the coming dawn took me into the death sleep.


Chapter Four

I awoke, curled around the coffin in the crypt feeling every inch the vampire. Tonight would be no exception. I was the angel of death, and I knew it.

Eternity would be this nightly ritual. I would live for food and sleep under the earth every time the sun rose. It would quickly bore me, and I would grow weary of the habitual feeding I was forced to do.

However, I was the embodiment of my own bloodthirsty nature and as much as I hated the thirst I was not going to destroy myself. I was what I was, and lamenting or trying to change the situation wasn't going to help me.

I walked the night awaiting another victim to fall helplessly into my arms. It was a homeless man, a burden to society. He was weak and vulnerable and I drank in his life essence hungrily.  Now what to do for the rest of the night ...

After depositing my victim in another dumpster, I walked the night, feeling myself drift in the sensation of being an outsider, being different. Never again would I feel connected to the human world I had left behind. Never.

I walked to a little bus stop and joined the queue of people, feeling my mood shift from contentment from the feed, to loneliness and heartbreak at my predicament. I felt so apart from everything, as if I were trapped in a dream from which I would never awake.

Suddenly I felt a hand on my arm, and I looked up at the person who had invaded my personal space.

"Yes ....?"

"I'm sorry to disturb you" A girl stammered "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, just a lot on my mind" I explained.

"I was wondering if you had the time".

Ah, a simple explanation and she had meant no intrusion. I glanced at my watch. "Eleven thirty. Its a bit late to be standing here with strangers, isn't it?"

She shrugged, her blonde hair falling elegantly over her shoulders. "Not really. I work two jobs, so I tend to come back at odd hours".

"You work two jobs?" I asked. Unbelievable, this young and attractive creature spending most of her time in work.

"When I'm not studying, yes" She explained.

"What is your name?" I asked gently.

"Victoria. Vicky for short" Vicky replied, smiling.

I smiled back and a bus came to the stop and I watched her board the bus. I clambered on after her, and sat down without paying. The bus driver grunted, but did not say anything.

I could hear her thoughts, and listened with a smile on my face, *...she's got on the same bus ... I wonder how old she is, she doesn't look older than twenty .... she's so pretty, I wonder what her name is .... look at those curves. Shit! I shouldn't be thinking like this ....*

I grinned broadly at the appraisal, but then another set of thoughts came to me, thoughts not from her but from a young brown haired male sitting behind Vicky. He was glancing at her slender throat, and she was oblivious of his glazed expression.

*.... I don't know whether to do it .... hell, why not .... she's probably a dyke anyway, so I'll force the bitch ..... yes, when she gets off this bus I'll fuck her senseless ... then I'll strangle her and throw her into a ditch ... fucking whore .... gonna kill you, bitch ....*

My hands clenched into a fist and it took all my reserve not to pounce on the bastard and rip his head off. Think he was going to hurt this fragile creature? Not with me around.

Vicky rose and smiled to me with a hint of longing before moving to the front of the bus. The rapist followed her, and I followed the rapist. The bus slowed to a halt and let all three of us off, all with different intentions. Vicky wanted to be home and get an early night. Jonathan wanted to rape and murder her before she got home safely. I wanted to rip Jonathan's head clean off his shoulders and rip his limbs into shreds for the mere thought of injuring this girl.

Perhaps it was because of the terrible way I had been brought into darkness, or because his intentions and his criminal history were so vast and horrible. Either way, I would not let him kill her.

Vicky was skipping down the street, her blonde hair falling carelessly over her shoulders. She had no idea of the danger following her. I watched Jonathan reach out for her shoulder and she turned with fright. She glanced at him uneasily as he brushed her cheek with his hand and then backhanded her. She sprawled inelegantly on the floor as he sat on top of her and forced her trousers down. She screamed for help.


I grabbed him from behind and lifted him into the air. He growled and kicked at me, his own trousers bulging from his unsatisfied desire.  Vicky was just staring at me, as if in awe, as I tore viciously into his throat and felt the tainted blood flow into my mouth. Every crime he had ever committed made my decision all the more just. He deserved to be dead, and to die horribly with his next victim watching it happen.

When I had taken my fill of the pitiful mortal, my gaze fell on Vicky. She was still lying on the ground, her shoulders shaking with cold and fear. Her eyes shimmered with unspent tears.

"Are you going to kill me ...?" Vicky asked in a frightened whisper.

"No" I said kindly. "I never meant for you to be hurt. I had to interfere before he violated you. I will leave now".

"No" Vicky tried to rise to her feet, but her legs gave way. She looked at me pitifully, with those huge blue eyes.

I was ready to walk away. I did not want to hurt her. She was so fragile. She reminded me of a stunning butterfly that was so easy to destroy. However, I could not leave her in the middle of a deserted road, with her legs giving way every time she meant to rise.

Gently, I took her pliant and unresisting body into my arms and walked to her home. I read the location from her mind, and we were soon at her humble abode. She gave me a key, her eyes open in astonishment, and I opened the door and walked in with her in my arms still. I casually placed her on a large sofa and then sat by her side.

Her hand reached out and she touched my hair, my face and the fabric of my tight evening dress. Her hand lingered on my breast and I felt the sudden movement from her. She was feeling desire and she was repulsed by her own longing. She was disgusted and already thoughts of what her friends would say entered her mind and filled her with fear.

I wanted to reassure her, wanted to tell her that to feel this way was alright. After all, I was not a mortal woman. I as unable to procreate and thus my sexual identity was no longer important. It was, in fact, extremely irrelevant.

"Vicky, why are you afraid of yourself?" I whispered, bringing her hand to my mouth and kissing the tender flesh between her fingers.

"I am not" Vicky gasped, licking her lips and gazing at me. "Why do I feel this way? I have never before fancied a woman. I have considered myself as straight as an arrow, yet I feel this passionate".

"I am no longer a woman, but a dazzling monster" I corrected her. "What you feel is the same as what any mortal would feel toward me".

"You saved me from that creep. Why?" Vicky asked. She truly wanted to understand what motivated me to save her.

"Because you are beautiful. Because you needed me, and it was something I could achieve. Something I could give" My voice broke. Why did she understand so much? Why did she hold my shoulder so firmly, as if never wanting to let go?

"I think I love you" Vicky stated softly.

I laughed, then saw the hurt in her eyes and shut up. She was giving me something of herself. I shouldn't laugh, it was mean and cruel. "You don't know what you mean. Besides we have only just met".

I rose to my feet, intending to leave. Instantly, Vicky was by my side. She threw her slender arms around my shoulders and hugged me to her. She was heated by her desire, and the scent of moisture between her legs was driving me crazy. She wanted me! She was driven by human desire, and the desire was almost overwhelming!

"What do you want from me?" I asked in a raw whisper.

"Please don't leave" Vicky begged. Her eyes were wide with wonder. "What can I do invite you to stay with me?"

I pulled her close and felt the soft body pressed against me tightly. "If only I could always have this emotion, this feeling of instant satisfaction".

"Why can't you?" Vicky asked me seriously. She was so innocent, not understanding what she was saying, or the implications of what that could mean.

Then suddenly it hit me. I could have her forever. I could give her this life, and have her by my side for all eternity. Our love could be endless.

Sighing in pleasure, I lifted her into my arms and took her up the stairs into the small bedroom. I placed her on the bed, and watched her intently as I removed the small black dress I wore, and hung it on the side of the bed. She gasped, and reached for me but I pulled back and sat beside her. I placed a finger on her mouth to quiet her, and then spoke rapidly.

"Vicky, I am a vampire. I have felt loneliness and hunger for companionship since I was created a few days ago. I cannot go on alone. Each night blends into the next, until it is unbearable. Do you understand what I am saying?".

Vicky nodded and reached for a small book in her bookcase. I smiled when I saw the cover.

"So you have read 'The Vampire Lestat'? If I were to offer the dark gift to you, Vicky, would you accept it? Would you be my companion forever?"

Vicky sighed and stared at me. Her answer shook me in fear, touched me to the core of my soul. "Yes ...."

I sighed and closed my eyes, wanting this moment to last forever. It was sweet and filled me with pleasure. "Is there anything you wish changed? Any physical thing you want me to change for you?"

Vicky shook her head after thinking for a short while. "No".

"Is there anything you would like to do before you come to me? Would you like me to treat you to a meal and drinks?".

Vicky shook her head, no. "I want to be with you".

I nodded in understanding. Then I pulled off her top in one easy and fluid motion. I watched her breasts heave in awkward movements and stripped her bra from her. I undid her jeans and slipped off her knickers and then watched her naked beauty. I quickly removed the rest of my clothing and slid on top of her, kissing her small mouth and feeling her buck wildly against me. I curled my fingers into a fist, and plunged it into the centre of her sexual need, hearing her moan in satisfaction as I moved my fist against her. Her rhythm increased as the heat flooded her cheeks, and I felt her shiver suddenly as the orgasm overtook her.  She suddenly relaxed into the pillow, her eyes half shut as she stared at me dreamily. I smiled and kissed her mouth once again, still continuing the fondling below. I opened my fist inside her, hearing her gasp into my ear and then sank my teeth into her neck.

She orgasmed immediately, and I felt the heat and wetness cover my hand as I continued to work her and drink from her. She groaned in pleasure or agony or both as she orgasmed repeatedly, unable to stop. With each movement of my hand coupled with the movement of my fang teeth in her flesh the desire brought her over the edge. She was crying for me in love, her eyes closed in this unbearable situation, her heart beating wildly.

Finally, I felt her heart stopping and drew back. I lifted the saturated hand to my lips and smelt the essence of her with pleasure. I lifted my wrist to my mouth and bit hard into the vein, gasping as I saw the blood flow.

Instantly, I moved it to her mouth and watched as the blood dripped down her throat.  Suddenly she caught my wrist viciously and held it to her mouth as she sucked and sucked. Her eyes were opened wide as she drank from me, and finally I moved away from her.

She groaned in agony as the wrist was removed. She looked at me and tried to smile, but I could tell she was in pain and suffering. Her eyes were misted over as she suddenly began to sob.

I was at her side immediately. "What's wrong?"

"It hurts" Vicky gasped in agony, she was doubled over on the bed.

"It won't last long" I murmured into her ear. I held her close as the death cramps continued, and eventually ceased.

I gazed at her in wonder as her skin started to whiten and her eyes had become unnaturally bright and clear. I gazed at her fingernails which were becoming translucent and transparent. She was beautiful. She was mine.

Then her cheeks suddenly flushed with humiliation and she sought to flee from me, but I held her close.

"What is it, my love?" I asked her, struggling to keep her in my arms.

She looked at me terrified and then she broke into tears. "Please let me go, this is humiliating".

Suddenly, I knew exactly what she was worried about. I hadn't even noticed, and yet she was humiliated by it.  I had no idea what to say to her. It didn't matter to me at all, yet she was feeling terrified. Maybe she thought I would leave her in disgust.

I was speechless with concern and I had no idea what to say next.

Chapter Five

When Vicky began to cry helplessly, I moved forward to embrace her but she shrunk away from my embrace, humiliated.

"But you know what this is" I stammered. "You've read Lestat's books, it is just your body getting rid of all the waste".

Vicky nodded, tears still brimming in her eyes "I feel so embarrassed about all this. You made it so romantic, so full of feeling. And here I am crapping myself".

I moved again toward her, and this time she did not move away. I caught her securely in my arms and kissed her hot forehead gently. "It will soon be over" I promised.

Vicky nodded and turned her head into my chest. She burrowed her small face into my breasts and stayed there, quivering and shaking. I tightened my grip around her.

"I am not ashamed of you" I whispered. "And I do not regret my decision to bring you across because of this. This does not matter to me, but I understand how humiliated you feel. Remember, I experienced the same thing a couple of days ago. It is nothing to fear or be ashamed of. Let me help you".

Vicky nodded and sighed as I lifted her to her feet. I crossed the room to the bathroom with her still held in my arms and ran a bath, dropping into the frothing water many scented things which would consume the odour of her waste.

I tested the water first, lest it be too hot or cold and then lowered her shaking form into the water. The death cramps had finished now, and she was looking a little better. I opened her mouth gently and examined her eye teeth. Perfect. They had grown a little sharper, and a little longer. It would be easy for her to feed in the coming nights.

I bathed her gently, using a soft sponge to outline her body, covering her with soap suds and affection. I kissed her mouth once again, and she started. Then she looked deep into my eyes.

I had doubted this operation until this moment. I had feared once she had the dark gift, she would leave me and start a life of her own. However, when she gazed into my eyes I saw nothing but the love she felt for me. The affection was beyond anything I had ever beheld.

"You're so beautiful" Vicky moaned, drawing me to her for another kiss.

I returned this kiss, still washing her slender body. Once I was sure her body had relieved itself of all the wastes, I lifted her out of the water and dried her off. Then I retired to her wardrobe and picked out some comfortable clothing - some soft trousers and a nice satin blouse and dressed her in these. I didn't bother with underwear. One thing I had learned from being a vampire was that underwear was unimportant. It was something extra which wrapped around the body, constricting it.

Vicky remained silent whilst I finished these menial tasks, and was still gazing at me when I brushed her soft and flowing hair, made even more lustrous by her transformation. Her eyes were glowing with preternatural beauty. Her lips curled into a sensuous smile.

"What are you feeling?" I finally asked, unable to wait any longer for her thoughts. After all, she was a vampire now. Had she nothing to say? Did she think of me as a monster? A bitch who brought her into something she didn't really want? Or was she satisfied?  I couldn't tell. The veil of silence had descended upon us forever.

"This is amazing" Vicky murmured, still watching me. I started to feel as a worm feels on a hook, squirming under her gaze. It made me feel slightly uncomfortable to have these hypnotic eyes staring at me with such love.

"Elaborate ..." I begged.

"Everything I have ever been, everything I have ever wished has been fulfilled" Vicky explained. "I wanted love and eternity. I have them both. I have a good maker" (here I felt anger towards my own maker for denying me this feeling) "I feel as if my whole life was leading up to this moment with you. I feel free, and I am in love".

I held out my hand to her, a small smile forming on my lips. "Time to feed my beauty. It may not be as easy as it looks, and it might create in you a moral dilemma".

Vicky shrugged as she took my hand. "Anything, as long as you are by my side".

I laughed tenderly, feeling completed and satisfied for the first time in days. "Then let us depart to prowl the mortal world!"

Chapter Six

I took her to a late night bar where I could hear rough thugs talking in stage whispers behind doors, where drug dealers where peddling their evil white powder on tables drinking beer and smoking weed. We walked hand in hand, looking for all the mortal world like two easy targets.

What a pleasure this was going to be.

How luscious Vicky looked as she gazed at me with desire and unconditional love.

I pulled her beside me, my hand strong and protective, guiding her behind me now. Big, rough and mean men everywhere. In fact, one man was dead in the corner, curled up as if in sleep. I chuckled.

A man with a horrendous beer belly moved in front of me. I stopped abruptly, and Vicky collided with me as I sought to steady her.

"Well, well. Looky what we have ere" The man sneered, turning around to laugh with his friends. "A couple a' lesbo's on a night out. What a place to come, ladies. Beer is real cheap, all the drugs you can take without dyin' on us and real men with real dicks to fuck you all night long".

A laugh echoed across the room. I scanned the inhabitants of the room intently. There were several men in the room, all killers in some way or another. From the wife beater and child killer in the corner, to the drug peddlers sitting at the crude tables.

Then I sensed *him*.

Instantly I backed away. The thug mistook my sudden reluctance for fear of him and stepped forward to roughly take me in his arms. I pushed him back with the force of a horse kicking him full in the chest.  He fell to the floor winded, and slid half way across the room.

Everyone fell silent. All except *him*.

An easy laugh escaped his throat. A small gesture of approval before turning to a chess game before him. Why hadn't I picked up his presence before? He was like us, a vampire. Then I truly started because there was another vampire beside him. Only this vampire was much older, and looked obviously wiser.

I tried to scan them both. Nothing. Not a glimmer of a thought. But it was painfully obvious they were successfully scanning me and reading all of my thoughts. I kept Vicky behind me the whole time, trying to adopt a defensive posture.

The other rough men in the bar, insulted that a 'little girl' would knock down one of the toughest drug dealers in the business walked threateningly towards me. I didn't even notice them. My gaze was locked to the elder of the vampires, my bottom lip trembling.

His gaze softened and he mouthed something which sounded like 'get back'. I then saw the rough men surrounding Vicky and I.

This was no lesson for Vicky. How to create a tavern brawl and use your supernatural powers for all the world to see. This was a sham, a complete disaster.

Vicky remained silent, her wide and imploring eyes darting intelligently around the room, assessing all the rough men surrounding us and drawing closer. She was holding my hand more tightly now. Protectively, as I trembled at the sight of a vampire so old.

All at once the elder vampire rose, left the table and his more youthful companion. He walked towards us and looked at me steadily in the eyes. "I'm sorry you didn't hear me correctly. I did not say 'get back', I said Lestat".

I was confused for an instant.

"You are a fledgling of Lestat" The elder informed me as if I were a stupid child.

"Oh yes" I mumbled and swept my eyes over his impressive body. He was reasonably tall, with greying hair and wide and expressive blue eyes. He looked wise, he spoke carefully and elegantly.  "Sort of. It was strange really. I don't know how to explain it".

The elder gave a terse shake of his head "Unimportant, my dear".

"And who are you, ancient one?" I asked sarcastically.

The elder vampire regarded me with his glowing eyes for a moment, and then sighed. "My name is Marius, and this is Armand, my fledgling. We are in New Orleans temporarily".

"Temporarily?" I asked in a heated tone. "Doing what, I wonder?".

Armand gave a short laugh "Its apparent Lestat has not considered anything regarding this rash and imprudent venture. He is unaware of a fledgling James has created, and that fledgling now has her own. What a mess! Lestat will definitely have some explaining to do when you get hold of him".

Marius shook his head gravely. "I waited for him for an hour outside Louis' little shack the other night, and you know what? He burned Louis house down! The brat really has no concern for anyone but himself!".

Now, I was listening to this rather intently. I started when I heard Louis' name being mentioned.

For anyone unfamiliar with Louis, God forbid, he was Lestat's third fledgling after the success of creating Gabrielle, and the blunder of creating Nicholas. Louis was a green eyed exotic beauty full of immeasurable guilt and suffering. He was beautiful and weak and vulnerable. I must admit, I was furious when I heard Lestat had burned his little house.

"The bastard!" I seethed, gaining myself a few surprised looks by Marius and Armand.

The men who surrounded me let loose a few hearty laughs and then sat back down with one look by Marius. Too strange.

Marius tapped his temple with a smile "The powers of the mind, my dear. I could convince a mortal to stand on foot and howl all evening if I so wished".

I laughed myself. Nothing in this elder's voice or manner alarmed me. Rather, his presence was calming and seductive all at once. Marius smiled at me, accepting my appraisal with a brief nod of approval.

"Should we be going ....?" Vicky murmured jealously.

I squeezed her small fingers in love, and shook my head. "I have a score to settle with Lestat, and I believe we should stay here together. All four of us".

Armand laughed aloud. "Join the queue my dear. Don't we all?"

Marius nodded, but Vicky looked less than enthusiastic. "One happy family" she said miserably.

Chapter Seven

Less than enthusiastic was an understatement.

I had never seen Vicky so utterly depressed. She moped around Marius' lavish house and kept her eyes towards the floor. She didn't look at me once. Armand and Marius left the house together well before dawn, allowing Vicky and I some privacy. They seemed uneasy about the distance between us, due to their unexpected entrance.

I caught her sadly skimming through a selection of books in the extensive library and turned her around to face me, planting a kiss on her forehead.

She smiled, or rather grimaced, and I sensed the jealousy cresting in her. She was such a fascinating creature. I felt hardly worthy of this envy stricken love.

"Armand and Marius have gone out" I whispered against her ear, feeling her quiver with desire in my arms. "Shall we check out the sleeping arrangements?"

"Sleeping arrangements" Vicky murmured, her eyes half closed. It was obvious she was enjoying the sensation of my lips moving over her earlobe and nibbling her earrings. She sighed and melted into my arms. I lifted her high and carried her into the bedroom, casually laying her down and smiling at her.

God, she was beautiful. She was staring at me with such profound emotion, I suddenly felt uneasy. I kissed her small mouth, and heard her sigh in pleasure.

"What angels looked over me and allowed me to find you, beautiful creature" I sighed, gazing into her eyes and her calm and sincere expression of love.

"The same angels that allowed me to find my one true love in the most unexpected of places" Vicky said, her voice gentle.

"Your one true love? You surely cannot mean me. I am nothing, I was created through rape and fear" I turned away, pain flickering at my soul.

Vicky pawed me with one slender hand, her fingers gently pressing through the sleeves of my jacket. She removed this jacket now, her hand roaming over my body making me tremble. "Let me love you now. Let me show you how much you mean to me".

I shivered. In truth, I was afraid. I liked to be dominant, to be the one in control. To relinquish control would be to relive the rape and be completely vulnerable to one who could destroy me with four simple words. Those words being, 'I don't love you'.
Vicky sensed my reluctance and understood the cause immediately. She sat up, her preternatural eyes skimming my body and her hands working on the zipper of my dress. She moved the fabric away from my naked frame and sighed in contentment. "Does this mean I am a lesbian?"

I shook my head. "There is no such thing with us .... vampires that is. We are companions in a dark and cruel world".

"I am glad of that" Vicky grinned and ran her hand over my breasts. I shivered in delight as her hand moved down to the small mound of fur between my legs. She pressed inward, and my head fell back. I felt nothing sexual from this gesture, but it was reminiscent of intercourse as a human being.

Vicky moved on top of me, pressing her body against me as she undressed quickly and lay down. Our breasts touching, our fur mounds colliding as she rocked rhythmically. Finally she kissed me on the neck, her fangs briefly touching my skin before travelling down. She licked and sucked my breasts, moving her hand still inside me, going deeper and deeper.  She worked her tender magic on me as she continued down and down, until her mouth was against my fur mound. Opening the lips like a rose in bloom, she drove one of her sharp fangs into my clitoris which became alive from the sudden shock of penetration. I groaned as I felt the blood rush to my genitals, and felt the pleasure in waves, moving along my spine and into my head which was throbbing and pounding.

"Vicky ...." I gasped, partly stunned by her forward behaviour and partly stunned by her utter abandon. She growled and drove her teeth into the walls of my vagina. I shuddered in agony as her teeth kept breaking the tender skin and the skin would then heal.

I lost track of time completely. There was only Vicky and I, alone and experiencing such amazing pleasure together. However, as the first light of dawn began to burn my skin, I hastily rose up beside her and shot over to the heavy curtains. Pulling them closed I ran back to Vicky, pressing the precious figure in my arms and pulling the sheets and covers protectively over her head.

She was already drifting into the death sleep and was murmuring something. I leant closer to hear her words, but they were a continuous hum of sleepy satisfaction. Tenderly, I kissed her head once more and closed my eyes awaiting the inevitable death sleep to overtake me.

The last thing I was aware of was the slight noise of Marius checking on his two female charges and humming to himself before the world went black as night. However, this night my body was not cold as a corpse. It was alive and heated and satisfied.

A feat only a real lover could manage.

Chapter Eight

"Lestat has regained his body" Marius explained to me a week later.

Vicky and I had been playing chess in the library, she was a much better player than I was.

I shuddered despite myself. "So what?"

"I hope you do not mind" Marius began uneasily "but I have told him about you".

My mouth dropped open. I was about to let a stream of insults escape my lips when I caught sight of the blonde haired demon walk by the room, and worriedly glance in.

Dropping the chess piece I was holding back onto the board, I fled outside to face him but he had disappeared.

"Where has he gone?" I screamed, running at Marius. "What does he want with me!"

Vicky had risen, fully intending to back me up, even though I was being completely irrational.

Armand entered the room and embraced me. I felt a swell of jealousy from my beloved fledgling and immediately backed away from Armand and took Vicky's hand. Plain and simple. I loved her, and I would not have her jealous over Armand.

"Where has he gone?" I asked more calmly.

"We'll take you there" Marius said softly, indicating for Armand to join us. "Vicky, you must stay here".

"Why?" Vicky asked, upset.

"Because this could get very ugly" Marius explained.

"Which is why I want to be there!" Vicky insisted.

I sighed. "Vicky they are right. Stay here, and I'll be back before the end of the night".


They took me to a hotel room, far away from the house. I could sense two powerful vampires inside. A brown haired and rather tanned muscular man flew the door open on our arrival and beckoned for me to enter. His mind was open and friendly, and he let me know his name soundlessly. David Talbot.

Marius and Armand smiled at each other, before disappearing out of the hotel room.

David and Lestat gestured to a cosy looking armchair. I seated myself, rather ashamed at the history between Lestat and myself, and I glanced at them briefly before turning away. I could feel my cheeks flushing with humiliation.

They were so beautiful. Hardly what I would call vampires. More like angels, shining like no creature of darkness ever could.

David smiled at me kindly "Why don't you tell us how you came to be a vampire, my dear?" This surprised me. I had thought Marius had told them everything already, but obviously he hadn't wished to comprise me in the slightest. He was leaving this to me entirely.

I looked at David, at his gentle and reassuring expression and I felt myself open. The words spilled out in a great, long sentence. I told them everything, starting from that fateful night. I described the rape in detail, and I saw a flicker of emotion on Lestat's face before he regained composure.

A single tear rolled down David's cheek as I described the night's after, the build up to despair and loneliness. I told them I was ashamed to be near them, they looked so beautiful. Lestat's face crumpled with this statement, and a gush of tears suddenly ran down his cheeks.

He held out his arms to me, and I just stared at him uncertain. Did I trust him enough to be held by him? No, I stayed where I was and Lestat folded his arms against his chest. Offer withdrawn. For an instant, I felt such pain by this I couldn't speak.

David, who perhaps knew my own thoughts better than I did, whispered something I didn't bother to hear, to Lestat.

He smiled tenderly at me and rose without saying a single word. He crossed the distance between us in a second and enfolded me in his arms. At first I struggled, reluctant to give up the independence I had become accustomed to. But it did feel rather nice, this emotion that I belonged here, wrapped in his strong arms.

I sighed. He murmured something, the tone soothing and sincere. Then he bent and kissed me on the forehead. A bolt of electricity passed through my body. I struggled to move away from him, and looked suspiciously at him as he laughed at me gently.

"Cherie, life has been difficult for you" Lestat finally spoke. "I can only imagine the utter loneliness you have suffered because of that body thief, Raglan James. However, I cannot change the past. What is done is done. But there will be a tomorrow, and I am eager to know you. Under that protective shield of anger is a beautiful woman. I know this and you know this. Yet you are using it as an excuse to push us away because you fear us. I have a responsibility to ensure your survival, no matter how and why you have entered my life. You are blood of my blood. You are a flicker of light from my eternal flame. I will seek to guide you to the best of my ability, and make up for the humiliation and heartbreak you have endured. I would make something out of nothing".

I stopped struggling with him. It was hopeless anyway. He was an immovable rock of strength. Yet, he was so tender with his grip on my shoulder, so secure the way he dug his fingers, yet did not harm me.  

"Every time I look into your face, I see that night" I sobbed helplessly.

Lestat kissed me, hugged me, drew me close. "That wasn't me, Cherie. The man who did this to you is dead and gone. There is only eternity. I would choose to have you in eternity beside me". Lestat laughed bitterly "We are so much alike, Cherie. I was brought across in no less a violent manner by a vampire who only used me to destroy him utterly and continue his blood line. Not much of a choice. I believe I understand a little what you are feeling".

I sighed and whimpered a little. He was right. I was being a fool.

"I have to get back home" I whispered.

"Why?" Lestat asked surprised.

"My fledgling is expecting me home soon" I explained.

Lestat's eyes shone with pride "You have a fledgling?"

"The most wonderful fledgling in the world" I confirmed.

Lestat laughed.

"I would like to meet this fledgling" He continued.

David nodded, his interest expanding also.

"Let's pick up Marius and Armand and head over to the house. We all have much to talk about, and it is crucial your fledgling is a part of this" Lestat explained softly.

I nodded and together we all journeyed back to Marius' house.

To this day, I will never forget the horror that awaited me once I had returned.

Chapter Nine

I felt quite safe, wrapped between Lestat and David, Armand and Marius leading the way. However, once we reached the house, Marius and Armand stopped in their tracks.

Marius turned to Lestat, and I saw some brief mental exchange flash between them, but I was not strong enough to interpret the words.

"What is it?" I asked Lestat.

"Wait here" Lestat said softly, leaving me with David whilst he, Marius and Armand approached the house before them.

Marius entered first, closely followed by Lestat and Armand. After five minutes they came out with extremely pale and blood streaked faces.

Lestat walked towards me and put a hand on my shoulder. "This is a letter from Vicky. Would you like me to read it to you?"

I gasped in horror. "Where is she? Has she left the house?"

Lestat shook his head sadly. "She set fire to herself in the bathtub. There is nothing but ashes there now".

"Vicky" I cried as I left Lestat's side and raced into the house. I barged past Marius and ran up the stairs into the bathroom.

Her clothes were still smouldering. Her body completely destroyed and turned to ash. I screamed her name again, helplessly, as Lestat enfolded me against him gently yet firmly and took me away from the bathroom. He sat me down in the bedroom.

Taking the letter from me he asked gently  "Would you like to read this in private, or would you prefer me to read this for you?"

My head was swimming. I didn't know what to say or think. Finally I nodded grimly, and allowed Lestat to tear open the letter and read it to me.

'Dearest One. By now you will have discovered my remains. I wish for you to scatter these ashes in memory of me, not attempt to bring me back into your sensual and painful world. I know we did not get a chance to speak about my feelings, but the jealousy I feel whenever someone touches you or holds you is unbearable. I feel like my heart is being taken from my body. I feel like a puppy who has been kicked for seemingly no reason at all. I know this attitude is not acceptable, but I could never change this part of myself. Never have I ever been so obsessed over a lover. Never have I felt so much envy, so much despair. I wish for you to let things lie now, and let me be. I have gone somewhere much better than this living hell, and I wish for you all the best. Remember I shall love you always. Always, Vicky'.

"Oh no, Vicky" I sobbed shamelessly.

Lestat covered me completely in his strong arms once again. "What's done is done. There is no way to go back in time and change events that have already happened.  However, it is your choice from now on. Would you like us to try and bring her back with our blood? Or would you scatter the ashes like she requested".

What a morbid decision to make on behalf of Vicky. I resented what she'd done, and I resented the fact she had never been completely honest about her unbearable feelings. "Bring her back".

Lestat nodded and tucked me up in bed. "Let David, Marius, Armand and myself handle this. You sleep for a while, get your strength back".

Indeed, I had not noticed my strength had ebbed and I was close to falling into a deep sleep.

I mumbled something incoherent before the world went black. Only this time the darkness was not complete. The painful recollection of what Vicky had done made the darkness even more jagged and brutal. If they couldn't bring her back, I didn't know what I would do with myself. At that moment I realised something terrible about myself.

Without Vicky, I did not truly care if I lived or died.

Chapter Ten

I awoke to the sounds of violent arguing from downstairs. I left the room, weary and my eyes half closed and carefully walked down the stairs. I kept quiet so I could listen to the conversation.

"What am I supposed to do? She asked me to try and bring her back?"

"Lestat! You are beyond all patience! It was impossible for you to assume she would come back fully restored. A revenant. Dear Lord! What a revenant!"

"So you killed her? Brought her to a swift death before my fledgling awakened and could see her state of mind, her insanity. She will never believe this event was out of our control. Never! You should have waited until she was awake!"

"There was no time, Lestat. The fledgling was out of control and trying to flee the house. She was never going to recover".

I listened for a brief while, and then left. Closing the front door silently, and walking out into the night. I inhaled a few sharp breaths. How on earth do you learn to deal with death? I was dead inside. Something so precious to me had been stripped away from me violently, and I would never see her again.

"Are you alright ...?"

I turned around. Marius was sitting nearby, watching me walk.

"I overhead" I said softly.

"I know" Marius explained.

"I know what happened" I said, tears in my eyes.

"I know" Marius repeated.

"She's gone, isn't she" I confirmed.

"Forever" Marius answered.

"I am alone" I confirmed.

"Never" Marius answered. "We all love you, we all need you. Come back to us".

I smiled tearfully. "I can't go back there, Marius".

"What are you going to do?" Marius asked softly.

"I'm going to fulfil a promise" I answered, leaving no room for doubt or misunderstanding. Marius sighed heavily and nodded.

"What do you want me to tell Lestat?"

"Tell him I appreciate his kindness and his love for me, even though he had no idea who I was or who I really am". Marius nodded, and walked towards me, enfolding me in his arms.

"Is there anything I can do to prevent this?"

"No" I said sadly, tears falling from my eyes. "I know where I truly belong...."


That morning, I stayed outside watching the dawn brighten the sky.

It was hurting my eyes tremendously, but I needed to finish this story before the sun would completely destroy me.

I needed to explain to Lestat why I was doing this. Why I felt I had done such a disservice to my beloved Vicky. She had never once held back with me, but I had held back with her. The immortal worlds, I love you, would have prevented her death. Of that I am sure.

I loved her, and I love her still. More so than the preternatural life that I was presented with by James Raglan. I need to be with her, wherever she is.

A tragic Romeo & Juliet ending indeed. Vicky was my soul, the other part of my life. Some people are never fortunate enough to find their one true love. I had found my true other half, and I could not let her go into the unknown without me at her side. I owed it to her to join her, be with her forever.

Lestat, my final words to you were I never blamed you for the way I was brought across. I understand it wasn't you, and that you felt you had a responsibility to look after me.  Marius, I thank you for your understanding and support. Armand, I thank you for your sympathy and friendship. David, I thank you for your love and politeness. Thank you to you all for loving me and trying to protect me.

As the sun finally rises, I feel no guilt for my choice. I know I have done the right thing. Vicky will be waiting for me, and this time we will never be separated again.

Farewell, my friends.

Adieu till we meet again.


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